Wikipedia: Perspective is the choice of a context or a reference (or the result of this choice) from which to sense, categorize, measure or codify experience, cohesively forming a belief. To choose a perspective is to choose a value system and, unavoidably, an associated belief system.
Henry Ford said, “If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own”.
Getting up and logging in to my electronica this morning was a bit like a 1:2 sucker punch. What started as a peaceful Sunday morning had me knocked back on my heels, wondering, basically, WTF, and that was before Id even had a coffee. Note to self – ALWAYS have coffee FIRST – that way when the world kicks you in the (metaphorical) balls, you are waaaaay better prepared. Getting ambushed before you’ve had that first caffeine shot really sucks.
Uncaffeinated, I wandered around in a bit of an emotional daze bouncing from “what have I done”, to “what am I doing”, to “how does someone who is only trying to get on with their life as best they know how and find a little happiness along the way, make sense of these slings and arrows”? [insert fairly profound and colourful string of profanity – wow, I can get inventive when I’m really pissed] .
I might not know much, but one thing I’ve learned is that firing off messages when you are seriously angry (or drunk) is about as bad an idea as reading said postings before coffee. Take a time out. So, coffee made, it was time to dig into some work . . . yes on a Sunday . . .big conference coming up next week and I have 2 weeks of work to cram into the next 4 days. So work on Sunday (and Saturday) is currently SOP. Also, a great place to bury yourself for a few hours while you cool off and work on some perspective. . . .there are lots worse alternatives. Usually I’d go for a long run, but exigent circumstances dictate work as today’s anodyne.
And here is where perspective comes into it. I logged into my office email, expecting the usual “can you take care of this” avalanche. Instead there was a heartbreaking message about a co-worker who had to make the inconceivable decision over the weekend to turn off the life support that was keeping his infant daughter alive and she had passed yesterday. How to fathom the sorrow that family is enduring. As a parent, I am devastated for them and I am thankful, all over again, for having a wonderful, healthy, happy daughter. The loss of a child is the one loss I think would be unbearable and I’ve never known how people find the courage to go on. I’m not sure I would be able to.
So . . .my revised perspective . . .BE THANKFUL FOR ALL THE GOODNESS IN YOUR LIFE. NEVER GIVE UP ON HOPE. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, get over your self-pity, stop indulging in self-destructive behaviours.